Dating Do's And Dont's

Dating by no means is easy. It’s complicated. It’s messy. It’s risky. However it’s necessary, whether one would like to admit it or not. Finding the one is no piece of cake, that person won’t magically drop in our laps. The search can be a long and tiring process; however that is no excuse for us to forget simple social etiquette of meeting other people.

Having been on a few dates myself, I’ve seen a couple of things that have irked me now and then. Fortunately it’s not just me who has these complains. Guys and girls both have been on the receiving end of this somewhat cruel treatment. I’ve divided the list into pre-date, on-date and post-date. Which of the following have you been considerate enough to follow? Or worse, which one of the following are you guilty of?

Pre-Date

When planning for a meet, it’s best to talk it out over the phone. Words can be misunderstood during text messaging by the reader and ultimately leading to confusion.

When deciding on a place, keep both wallets (yours and his) in mind. Dating is unpredictable and if there is no second chance, then why blow precious money?! Go Dutch – unless the other person is specifically planning on treating you. Never assume it!

Don’t dress up! Be casual! Clothes that you feel comfortable will automatically make you feel relaxed. If your clothes make you stand out in a crowd and attract attention, there is a very good chance that your date will feel uncomfortable. But do refrain from looking like something the cat dragged in.

Smell good! You have to smell good! Bad odors from any part of the body indicate poor hygiene – an instant turn off for many. Keep a pocket mint for bad breath. Be generous and offer your date one as well.

If you plan on picking up your date on a motorcycle, make sure to borrow an extra helmet. If you can’t arrange one, ask him to do so! Just like sex – best to be safe than sorry!

Lastly if you can’t make it – tell in advance. Do not spring it on the other person the last minute or simply not show up and ignore his texts and call.

On-Date

Pay attention to your date! That’s the first rule of dating. You are here to meet him. So talk to him. Do not pay attention to your cell phone, T.V. or the worst – another person present there. Eyeing another person is a complete deal breaker!

Do not take along your best friend on the date. You do not need his approval to date. If you do not feel safe meeting a guy, then simply don’t! Dating is meant for companies, not crowds. Do not have him scout for you either!

Talking about religion and politics is generally a bad idea since conflicting views may lead to heated arguments and possibly ego clashes. Keep these for later dates unless these topics are the ‘it’ thing for discussion between you two.

If one of the two is more of a silent type, the other one has to steer the conversation. However refrain from over-talking, over-sharing and cutting the other guy mid-sentence.

Avoid getting physical, touchy-grabby on the first date. People generally don’t like that! A handshake at the start and a hug at the end are pretty good. No need to steer into dark alleys for a quick squeeze.

First dates are awkward most of the time. And that’s perfectly okay! As long as neither of the two wants to do a Road Runner imitation, it’s all good!

Do not attend any phone calls or reply to any text messages unless it’s a matter of life and death. Guys have actually complained of their date’s text messaging other guys during meets. No wonder dating sucks according to most guys!

If you are into smoking or drinking, but your date isn’t – do ask him if he would be fine if you light one up or order some booze. People with asthma will instantly stop you – and you need to listen to them!

Post-Date

Post date text – this is quite possibly the most important part of the date and sets the tone for whatever happens next. There is really nothing wrong in being the first one to text – doing so doesn’t give the impression that you are clingy, weak or desperate. It’s a compliment to tell someone that you had fun with them!

Post date text should preferably not lead to more text messaging in my opinion. Now that gives the impression that you’re clingy, weak or desperate. Take time and give time!

If you are dropping the other person back at his place, do not invite yourself inside unless the other person asks you so. It’s his crib, he knows best!

None of these are really that hard to follow. Plus I feel that this will definitely ease up on the man drama in our social lives. Take care till the next time!

Originally published in Gaylaxy March-April, 2011. You can check out it's archives by clicking here.

Dating Do's And Dont's

Dating by no means is easy. It’s complicated. It’s messy. It’s risky. However it’s necessary, whether one would like to admit it or not. Finding the one is no piece of cake, that person won’t magically drop in our laps. The search can be a long and tiring process; however that is no excuse for us to forget simple social etiquette of meeting other people.

Having been on a few dates myself, I’ve seen a couple of things that have irked me now and then. Fortunately it’s not just me who has these complains. Guys and girls both have been on the receiving end of this somewhat cruel treatment. I’ve divided the list into pre-date, on-date and post-date. Which of the following have you been considerate enough to follow? Or worse, which one of the following are you guilty of?

Pre-Date

When planning for a meet, it’s best to talk it out over the phone. Words can be misunderstood during text messaging by the reader and ultimately leading to confusion.

When deciding on a place, keep both wallets (yours and his) in mind. Dating is unpredictable and if there is no second chance, then why blow precious money?! Go Dutch – unless the other person is specifically planning on treating you. Never assume it!

Don’t dress up! Be casual! Clothes that you feel comfortable will automatically make you feel relaxed. If your clothes make you stand out in a crowd and attract attention, there is a very good chance that your date will feel uncomfortable. But do refrain from looking like something the cat dragged in.

Smell good! You have to smell good! Bad odors from any part of the body indicate poor hygiene – an instant turn off for many. Keep a pocket mint for bad breath. Be generous and offer your date one as well.

If you plan on picking up your date on a motorcycle, make sure to borrow an extra helmet. If you can’t arrange one, ask him to do so! Just like sex – best to be safe than sorry!

Lastly if you can’t make it – tell in advance. Do not spring it on the other person the last minute or simply not show up and ignore his texts and call.

On-Date

Pay attention to your date! That’s the first rule of dating. You are here to meet him. So talk to him. Do not pay attention to your cell phone, T.V. or the worst – another person present there. Eyeing another person is a complete deal breaker!

Do not take along your best friend on the date. You do not need his approval to date. If you do not feel safe meeting a guy, then simply don’t! Dating is meant for companies, not crowds. Do not have him scout for you either!

Talking about religion and politics is generally a bad idea since conflicting views may lead to heated arguments and possibly ego clashes. Keep these for later dates unless these topics are the ‘it’ thing for discussion between you two.

If one of the two is more of a silent type, the other one has to steer the conversation. However refrain from over-talking, over-sharing and cutting the other guy mid-sentence.

Avoid getting physical, touchy-grabby on the first date. People generally don’t like that! A handshake at the start and a hug at the end are pretty good. No need to steer into dark alleys for a quick squeeze.

First dates are awkward most of the time. And that’s perfectly okay! As long as neither of the two wants to do a Road Runner imitation, it’s all good!

Do not attend any phone calls or reply to any text messages unless it’s a matter of life and death. Guys have actually complained of their date’s text messaging other guys during meets. No wonder dating sucks according to most guys!

If you are into smoking or drinking, but your date isn’t – do ask him if he would be fine if you light one up or order some booze. People with asthma will instantly stop you – and you need to listen to them!

Post-Date

Post date text – this is quite possibly the most important part of the date and sets the tone for whatever happens next. There is really nothing wrong in being the first one to text – doing so doesn’t give the impression that you are clingy, weak or desperate. It’s a compliment to tell someone that you had fun with them!

Post date text should preferably not lead to more text messaging in my opinion. Now that gives the impression that you’re clingy, weak or desperate. Take time and give time!

If you are dropping the other person back at his place, do not invite yourself inside unless the other person asks you so. It’s his crib, he knows best!

None of these are really that hard to follow. Plus I feel that this will definitely ease up on the man drama in our social lives. Take care till the next time!

Originally published in Gaylaxy March-April, 2011. You can check out it's archives by clicking here.

Na Na Na Come On - Update

Okay I know it took me long but the post about my date with Josh is finally up and you can view it here.

I'm turning comments for this particular post so whatever is it that you would like to say drop it there. Once again, I'm super sorry that I took so long. Exams are coming up and I am really terribly busy!

Hope everyone is having a wonderful summer. 

Na Na Na Come On - Update

Okay I know it took me long but the post about my date with Josh is finally up and you can view it here.

I'm turning comments for this particular post so whatever is it that you would like to say drop it there. Once again, I'm super sorry that I took so long. Exams are coming up and I am really terribly busy!

Hope everyone is having a wonderful summer. 

Na Na Na Come On

On 25th May, on a phone call I asked Josh out for the third and last time. Fortunately for both of us, he accepted me invitation to take him out. I have known since quite sometime that I am interested in Josh. Not  yet to the extent that I was interested in Nathan but still I am interested in him. I think he picked up on it and delayed the meet, perhaps he was genuine in his excuses - I don't know.

This date was the perfect opportunity to see if he is really interested and for that, I told him to set up half of the date. I would be responsible for the entertainment. Nourishment would be his department. Josh didn't mind the set-up, in fact he suggested that we keep our plans a secret. I liked that suggestion. Things are already looking up, I thought to myself.

"So do I need to bring a spare underwear?", Josh teased.

"You better!", I said playing along his lines. "There might be an accident when you see me!".

"Oh really?", he confirmed. We had a laugh over it and moved on to other random discussion.

"So where are we meeting?", Josh asked on the evening on May 31st.

"Wasn't that supposed to be kept a surprise?", I asked.

"I would need to know to get there!", Josh explained.

I thought for a while and asked him, "How do you feel about a carpool?"

"Carpool?!", he confirmed.

"Bad idea?", I asked.

"Not really. But I'd like to take my car. Don't mind but I don't trust other people's driving easily." Josh told me hesitantly. I didn't mind. Poor guy had been involved in a bad accident two years ago. I do understand his reluctance to trust other people's driving skills.

"Okay, but I get to pay for the gas!", I argued.

"What if I get it filled up before picking you up?", he poked.

"Then you are far more devious than I calculated you to be!", I replied.

"By the way, get ready to listen to alot of Rihanna. Cuz that's all I am playing in the car nowadays!", he warned.

"Don't worry. I'm perfectly good at being bad!", I poked at him.

All this teasing was getting me excited. I can't begin to tell you how pepped up I was for 2nd June. Even in gym that day, I was more energized for some reason. Usually my RPM (Revolution per minute ) is 91, but that day it was soaring at 102. Yowzah!

I'll be putting up the proceeding of the date in a few hours. I already have some typed and you would be able to view it on C&B. Yeah, even though this date would be significantly different from the rest but Josh is still a candidate - leading by a wide margin but still a candidate. Gotta play fair!

Also it was so heart warming to read your best wishes in my Facebook messages and Formspring. Seriously you guys created magic. Thanks a mill for that!

In a quick review Josh said that it was one of the best dates he has ever been on - his words, not mine so I have a good feeling about the date.

What happened on it?!

You'll find it out soon enough!

I'm incredibly sorry for the delay but with exams coming up soon I'm surprised I managed to find time out to go out and much more on the fact that I was able to convince my parents. :P 

Na Na Na Come On

On 25th May, on a phone call I asked Josh out for the third and last time. Fortunately for both of us, he accepted me invitation to take him out. I have known since quite sometime that I am interested in Josh. Not  yet to the extent that I was interested in Nathan but still I am interested in him. I think he picked up on it and delayed the meet, perhaps he was genuine in his excuses - I don't know.

This date was the perfect opportunity to see if he is really interested and for that, I told him to set up half of the date. I would be responsible for the entertainment. Nourishment would be his department. Josh didn't mind the set-up, in fact he suggested that we keep our plans a secret. I liked that suggestion. Things are already looking up, I thought to myself.

"So do I need to bring a spare underwear?", Josh teased.

"You better!", I said playing along his lines. "There might be an accident when you see me!".

"Oh really?", he confirmed. We had a laugh over it and moved on to other random discussion.

"So where are we meeting?", Josh asked on the evening on May 31st.

"Wasn't that supposed to be kept a surprise?", I asked.

"I would need to know to get there!", Josh explained.

I thought for a while and asked him, "How do you feel about a carpool?"

"Carpool?!", he confirmed.

"Bad idea?", I asked.

"Not really. But I'd like to take my car. Don't mind but I don't trust other people's driving easily." Josh told me hesitantly. I didn't mind. Poor guy had been involved in a bad accident two years ago. I do understand his reluctance to trust other people's driving skills.

"Okay, but I get to pay for the gas!", I argued.

"What if I get it filled up before picking you up?", he poked.

"Then you are far more devious than I calculated you to be!", I replied.

"By the way, get ready to listen to alot of Rihanna. Cuz that's all I am playing in the car nowadays!", he warned.

"Don't worry. I'm perfectly good at being bad!", I poked at him.

All this teasing was getting me excited. I can't begin to tell you how pepped up I was for 2nd June. Even in gym that day, I was more energized for some reason. Usually my RPM (Revolution per minute ) is 91, but that day it was soaring at 102. Yowzah!

I'll be putting up the proceeding of the date in a few hours. I already have some typed and you would be able to view it on C&B. Yeah, even though this date would be significantly different from the rest but Josh is still a candidate - leading by a wide margin but still a candidate. Gotta play fair!

Also it was so heart warming to read your best wishes in my Facebook messages and Formspring. Seriously you guys created magic. Thanks a mill for that!

In a quick review Josh said that it was one of the best dates he has ever been on - his words, not mine so I have a good feeling about the date.

What happened on it?!

You'll find it out soon enough!

I'm incredibly sorry for the delay but with exams coming up soon I'm surprised I managed to find time out to go out and much more on the fact that I was able to convince my parents. :P 

Hallelujah

I should have been a lawyer. I seriously should have a lawyer, or maybe something that involves selling something to people. I really should be!

I just got off the phone with Josh and I am very happy to tell you all that I am going to be meeting Josh on 2nd June. This is bloody terrific! I am happy beyond belief, and the cherry on the top of entire cake happened at the end of the conversation. But let me not hurry and tell you everything!

The conversation started out very ordinary. He called me up as sometimes he does out of the blue for small talk when he is too tired to chat. He changed his gym timings from night to evening because he has classes in the morning now and gets off in time for lunch around 2. He asked how is my exam preparation going and I told him it's going okay aside from the fact that I don't feel like studying much most of the time. So I am reading and looking at the diagrams, trying to make notes on the sides of my books and listen to the audio lectures.

"I'll be super busy the next month but I'd like if we can meet up sometime!", I told him. It sort of blurted out, but I was half meaning to ask him out once more for a date sometime in June.

"You want to meet?", he asked.

"Yeah!", I told him. "I have exams in July but I can spare a day for a meet if you are interested. Plus you have exams sometime in August and September, so you would be busy in months after June as well. Sometime in the first two weeks of June sounds good to me!"

"Are you free on 2nd June?", he asks.

"Sure. You?", I asked him.

"I suggested 2nd June, but I'm fine with any date you decide."

"I'm fine with 2nd!", I confirm.

"Fantastic!", Josh has a habit of saying that very often, I have noticed. "2nd it is, and don't get excited now. But I thought you would never ask me again after I blew you off the previous two times!"

"This was my last shot anyways kiddo!", I told him.

"And you will not call me 'kiddo' on the date!" he says sternly.

The date is set, we're still working on the other details. I want something casual, but I don't know what he feels. First dates need to be easy and breezy. If things go well, we can have lots of intimate ones later. What do you say?

I'm SO happy!

Hallelujah

I should have been a lawyer. I seriously should have a lawyer, or maybe something that involves selling something to people. I really should be!

I just got off the phone with Josh and I am very happy to tell you all that I am going to be meeting Josh on 2nd June. This is bloody terrific! I am happy beyond belief, and the cherry on the top of entire cake happened at the end of the conversation. But let me not hurry and tell you everything!

The conversation started out very ordinary. He called me up as sometimes he does out of the blue for small talk when he is too tired to chat. He changed his gym timings from night to evening because he has classes in the morning now and gets off in time for lunch around 2. He asked how is my exam preparation going and I told him it's going okay aside from the fact that I don't feel like studying much most of the time. So I am reading and looking at the diagrams, trying to make notes on the sides of my books and listen to the audio lectures.

"I'll be super busy the next month but I'd like if we can meet up sometime!", I told him. It sort of blurted out, but I was half meaning to ask him out once more for a date sometime in June.

"You want to meet?", he asked.

"Yeah!", I told him. "I have exams in July but I can spare a day for a meet if you are interested. Plus you have exams sometime in August and September, so you would be busy in months after June as well. Sometime in the first two weeks of June sounds good to me!"

"Are you free on 2nd June?", he asks.

"Sure. You?", I asked him.

"I suggested 2nd June, but I'm fine with any date you decide."

"I'm fine with 2nd!", I confirm.

"Fantastic!", Josh has a habit of saying that very often, I have noticed. "2nd it is, and don't get excited now. But I thought you would never ask me again after I blew you off the previous two times!"

"This was my last shot anyways kiddo!", I told him.

"And you will not call me 'kiddo' on the date!" he says sternly.

The date is set, we're still working on the other details. I want something casual, but I don't know what he feels. First dates need to be easy and breezy. If things go well, we can have lots of intimate ones later. What do you say?

I'm SO happy!

Issues; Young & Unfabulous

I started dating a few months ago and I am extremely disappointed with the results. Everybody that I contact or contacts me wants to bang me. All of my friends have girlfriends and they all say it's great to have someone. I have been feeling very depressed lately and I think that's because I have not ever experienced being in love. I'm eighteen and extremely frustrated. Am I looking in the wrong place or is there something wrong with me?

No, there's absolutely nothing wrong with you. Everybody wants to feel loved and we all do search for someone to love at some point in our life. But I think at 18, your much too young to be in a relationship. Plus having a boyfriend opens the door to a whole different kind of problem. I do understand your desire to couple, however 18 is barely enough to get involved into something serious.

Your friends are straight. Their girlfriends are from the same school. In my opinion, it's not love but sort of a right place, right time kind of thing with them. Half of these couple won't survive by the time they graduate anyways. I'm not being sarcastic but telling you quite honestly from my experience. Another thing is that your friends being straight, you can never really discuss with them about how great it was to be out with your guy the past weekend. I would also not recommend you changing your boyfriend's sex for the sake of discussion. Firstly it would be a huge insult to him and secondly you might get so excited in telling your friends about your latest adventure that you may actually say 'He' or 'Him' by accident. A few slips like that and someone sharp enough in your surrounding may sniff out the truth.

Also consider this a friendly warning, anything below 19 years old in the Online world is generally perceived as a twink and the first thing about twinks is that they should be creamed. So do the maths - most guys would want to bang you no strings attached. Your best shot at something serious is with someone closer to your age and favorably with the similar experience.

Lastly love doesn't come by easy. Having already put myself out there and having read countless other people do so, I'm telling you that it takes a very long time to find something worthy. Your best bet would be to look for friends and if by chance you  come across someone you genuinely like then you take the chance. But even then it's a gamble. Plus this need of yours to have someone, a friend can fill that need just as much by being a shoulder to lean on and an ear to listen to. As my dear friend put it;

'Lovers come and go. Friends stay forever!' 

Your 18 and fabulous! I really don't think you need a boyfriend right now. At Eighteen, I used to make fun of my friends who were committed and I never failed to tick a few off. At 18, you are going through a very crucial career deciding part of your life. A boyfriend could provide a casual comfort or a disastrous distraction, 'cuz believe me - a boyfriend comes with it's own set of trials and tribulations. Think about it!

Issues; Young & Unfabulous

I started dating a few months ago and I am extremely disappointed with the results. Everybody that I contact or contacts me wants to bang me. All of my friends have girlfriends and they all say it's great to have someone. I have been feeling very depressed lately and I think that's because I have not ever experienced being in love. I'm eighteen and extremely frustrated. Am I looking in the wrong place or is there something wrong with me?

No, there's absolutely nothing wrong with you. Everybody wants to feel loved and we all do search for someone to love at some point in our life. But I think at 18, your much too young to be in a relationship. Plus having a boyfriend opens the door to a whole different kind of problem. I do understand your desire to couple, however 18 is barely enough to get involved into something serious.

Your friends are straight. Their girlfriends are from the same school. In my opinion, it's not love but sort of a right place, right time kind of thing with them. Half of these couple won't survive by the time they graduate anyways. I'm not being sarcastic but telling you quite honestly from my experience. Another thing is that your friends being straight, you can never really discuss with them about how great it was to be out with your guy the past weekend. I would also not recommend you changing your boyfriend's sex for the sake of discussion. Firstly it would be a huge insult to him and secondly you might get so excited in telling your friends about your latest adventure that you may actually say 'He' or 'Him' by accident. A few slips like that and someone sharp enough in your surrounding may sniff out the truth.

Also consider this a friendly warning, anything below 19 years old in the Online world is generally perceived as a twink and the first thing about twinks is that they should be creamed. So do the maths - most guys would want to bang you no strings attached. Your best shot at something serious is with someone closer to your age and favorably with the similar experience.

Lastly love doesn't come by easy. Having already put myself out there and having read countless other people do so, I'm telling you that it takes a very long time to find something worthy. Your best bet would be to look for friends and if by chance you  come across someone you genuinely like then you take the chance. But even then it's a gamble. Plus this need of yours to have someone, a friend can fill that need just as much by being a shoulder to lean on and an ear to listen to. As my dear friend put it;

'Lovers come and go. Friends stay forever!' 

Your 18 and fabulous! I really don't think you need a boyfriend right now. At Eighteen, I used to make fun of my friends who were committed and I never failed to tick a few off. At 18, you are going through a very crucial career deciding part of your life. A boyfriend could provide a casual comfort or a disastrous distraction, 'cuz believe me - a boyfriend comes with it's own set of trials and tribulations. Think about it!

Call Me Old Fashioned

While talking on phone last Sunday, Josh was inquiring about Nathan. Talking about ex with potential boyfriends has always been something I still am not comfortable with and that's why I have never told any guy I went out with about Nathan or Bruce, unless I was interested in him and felt that he should know. The other case would be that we're pretty solid friends. I don't hide anything but people tend to get the wrong impression sometimes that I may still be harboring some feelings from the last guy. I explained clearly that it's over and it's been quite sometime since it got over.

"So when did the two of you first make out?", he asked.

"On our four month anniversary!", I told him.

"What?! You guys waited four months for the first kiss?!", he was in complete shock.

"Well, before that he was not in Pakistan so I really don't think we had any other option!", I told him. I was feeling so bloody awkward that I can't put it to words.

"So if he was in Pakistan, then when would it have happened?", he asked.

I already knew my version of the answer in my head, but I felt that I didn't need to tell everything yet. "It isn't completely upon me to decide when it would have happened. It would have been sooner definitely, but planned or spontaneous I don't know!"

I felt my answer was perfect. Quite obviously only complete fools would force themselves upon their partners. I would have taken up Nathan's opinion on the matter. Besides with Nathan there was a completely difference scenario as compared to what could possibly happen with Josh. Nathan was from a different country, so meeting was not an option. With Josh living in the same city as me, meeting is very easy if he ever agrees to it. There are so many restaurants and even a mall near to his place that it's unbelievable. Plus there is an amusement park which completely sucks but the only thing we plan to ride is each other. LOL!

For me, it depends upon my chemistry with the guy. I have to be at ease. I can't be a bundle of nerves when I'm making out. More importantly I need to know that the other guy is genuinely interested. I don't want to be taken along for a ride where things happen only to find out that they meant completely different than what I had experienced. Nobody touches my junk but my one and only!

It's not some silly trick to put the other guy under pressure, but it is to ensure my own personal emotional safety. Also with two of us being in the same city, I don't want to crash into a sexual frenzy with Josh where both of us are feeling frisky every time we meet. I've seen, heard and read this happen so many times to so many couples - both straight and gay. When everything starts it's all sparks and steamy kisses, it's perfectly natural to be passionate. The fire burns high and the fire burns deep. But a couple of months down the lane, things start to feel less special and more predictable. Eventually one or the other person gets bored and decides to break up. It's all good if that's what they both wanted - a mutual physical love for a time being. But it's not what I want. I want something that exists outside the premises of the bed and to go on. But in such cases, guys like me are left high and dry. Makes perfect sense to take every precaution possible!

I asked Josh when did he first kiss his first boyfriend. "The day we decided to be together!", he replied in a very casual tone.

His answer definitely raised my eye brows, but I decided to keep an open mind. It does sound perfectly okay. They both accepted mutual feelings of affection towards each other so why not seal the deal with a kiss. It could have happened in a moment of passion.

I think I haven't made it clear to Josh that he should not expect physical intimacy anytime soon. I'm fine with holding hands and a hug if I can get one, but anything else will have to wait. And absolutely nothing will happen on the first date if that ever comes into being. It's not that I need the other person to say 'I Love You', but his simple actions can make it click for me. Who doesn't like making out?! But making out with someone special is most definitely better than something only half passionate.

-----------------------------------------------------

A very dear friend of mine and a reader of my blog is lately facing some turmoil where he's torn halfway between hope and despair. I can't disclose details or his identity, but to anybody reading this I want to request that you wish him the best. May God have scripted his life to his best interests! May he always be not only satisfied but happy with what he is blessed with!

- Amen 

Call Me Old Fashioned

While talking on phone last Sunday, Josh was inquiring about Nathan. Talking about ex with potential boyfriends has always been something I still am not comfortable with and that's why I have never told any guy I went out with about Nathan or Bruce, unless I was interested in him and felt that he should know. The other case would be that we're pretty solid friends. I don't hide anything but people tend to get the wrong impression sometimes that I may still be harboring some feelings from the last guy. I explained clearly that it's over and it's been quite sometime since it got over.

"So when did the two of you first make out?", he asked.

"On our four month anniversary!", I told him.

"What?! You guys waited four months for the first kiss?!", he was in complete shock.

"Well, before that he was not in Pakistan so I really don't think we had any other option!", I told him. I was feeling so bloody awkward that I can't put it to words.

"So if he was in Pakistan, then when would it have happened?", he asked.

I already knew my version of the answer in my head, but I felt that I didn't need to tell everything yet. "It isn't completely upon me to decide when it would have happened. It would have been sooner definitely, but planned or spontaneous I don't know!"

I felt my answer was perfect. Quite obviously only complete fools would force themselves upon their partners. I would have taken up Nathan's opinion on the matter. Besides with Nathan there was a completely difference scenario as compared to what could possibly happen with Josh. Nathan was from a different country, so meeting was not an option. With Josh living in the same city as me, meeting is very easy if he ever agrees to it. There are so many restaurants and even a mall near to his place that it's unbelievable. Plus there is an amusement park which completely sucks but the only thing we plan to ride is each other. LOL!

For me, it depends upon my chemistry with the guy. I have to be at ease. I can't be a bundle of nerves when I'm making out. More importantly I need to know that the other guy is genuinely interested. I don't want to be taken along for a ride where things happen only to find out that they meant completely different than what I had experienced. Nobody touches my junk but my one and only!

It's not some silly trick to put the other guy under pressure, but it is to ensure my own personal emotional safety. Also with two of us being in the same city, I don't want to crash into a sexual frenzy with Josh where both of us are feeling frisky every time we meet. I've seen, heard and read this happen so many times to so many couples - both straight and gay. When everything starts it's all sparks and steamy kisses, it's perfectly natural to be passionate. The fire burns high and the fire burns deep. But a couple of months down the lane, things start to feel less special and more predictable. Eventually one or the other person gets bored and decides to break up. It's all good if that's what they both wanted - a mutual physical love for a time being. But it's not what I want. I want something that exists outside the premises of the bed and to go on. But in such cases, guys like me are left high and dry. Makes perfect sense to take every precaution possible!

I asked Josh when did he first kiss his first boyfriend. "The day we decided to be together!", he replied in a very casual tone.

His answer definitely raised my eye brows, but I decided to keep an open mind. It does sound perfectly okay. They both accepted mutual feelings of affection towards each other so why not seal the deal with a kiss. It could have happened in a moment of passion.

I think I haven't made it clear to Josh that he should not expect physical intimacy anytime soon. I'm fine with holding hands and a hug if I can get one, but anything else will have to wait. And absolutely nothing will happen on the first date if that ever comes into being. It's not that I need the other person to say 'I Love You', but his simple actions can make it click for me. Who doesn't like making out?! But making out with someone special is most definitely better than something only half passionate.

-----------------------------------------------------

A very dear friend of mine and a reader of my blog is lately facing some turmoil where he's torn halfway between hope and despair. I can't disclose details or his identity, but to anybody reading this I want to request that you wish him the best. May God have scripted his life to his best interests! May he always be not only satisfied but happy with what he is blessed with!

- Amen 

A Is For Avoidance

I don't think of myself as a superstitious person. I really don't! However I've had a bad run with a certain variable and I have grown very cautious about it. Generally little thing like this are not something that I would let hold me back, but lately the thought just can't escape from my head. The thought being that guys who's real names begin with A are not suitable for a relationship when it comes to me.

As little children, when we start learning the alphabets we are given these books which have the alphabet on one page and directly opposite is an object who's name starts with the said letter. Like A stands for Apple, B is for Ball, C is for Cat and so on. My personal opinion has changed and in my picture book A does not stand for Apple but for Avoidance.

This avoidance isn't something I would fancy to have but rather a cold and cruel compilation of bittersweet facts. Looking back over to the guys I've gotten involved with both Nathan and Bruce had their names starting with A. Ryan - my best friend has just about everything I like in a guy but he doesn't turn me on the least bit even though he is quite attractive. By chance, his name also begins with the letter A. Then two guys with whom things got really messy once I turned them down also had their names from A. Another guy who took great interest in me up till the point he saw my picture also had an A name. And lastly a certain guy who's advances I'm trying to stop effecting me also has a name starting with the letter A.

There is most definitely a certain pattern to this madness. I don't know how the whole name business affects my relationship chemistry or just the fact how I have to behave with another guy. But in any case, it does make sense that I avoid such guys like the plague.

I won't deny that I have gotten a wee bit commitment phobic since my break up with Nathan. But the search is still going on. I am literally now scared to get to know the name of a certain guy I like. Everytime I send a message asking for his name and get a reply for it, I'm literally praying "Don't let the name be from the letter A! Don't let the name be from the letter A!". It's crazy but I can't help it! If I see a certain way out to save something from crashing and burning, I would grab on to every last straw I possibly can.

If you recall from an earlier post about my friend Ted who was trying to fix me up with his best friend. Unfortunately for me, his name started with the letter A. Uh Oh! Did my love boat sink even before leaving the dock?

No!, I told myself. Your being completely stupid and irrational, this really isn't something that you should give a second thought to. It's all in your head. Snap out of it! Given my history I can't help being so paranoid, but Ted really thinks we can be a great couple and I should really give him a chance.

Two days ago I got a text from Ted's friend asking if I was free for a phone call. I was and a three minutes later we were on. The talk started very casually with both of us updating each other about our lives. However the call was strictly business from his end. Turns out he is having some tough issues to face right now and doesn't really have time for a relation. He thinks I'm a great guy but we would be better off as friends. Perhaps at some other point, we would have been a good couple but now is not the right time. In short, it's over!

I'm not mad at him. I'm glad he was upfront and honest with me. He didn't really tell me what stuff is exactly going on but it it is indeed true - I hope he solves the issues soon. He's a nice guy. At any rate, another guy who's name starts with A turned me down. Please tell me it's not just in my head! 

A Is For Avoidance

I don't think of myself as a superstitious person. I really don't! However I've had a bad run with a certain variable and I have grown very cautious about it. Generally little thing like this are not something that I would let hold me back, but lately the thought just can't escape from my head. The thought being that guys who's real names begin with A are not suitable for a relationship when it comes to me.

As little children, when we start learning the alphabets we are given these books which have the alphabet on one page and directly opposite is an object who's name starts with the said letter. Like A stands for Apple, B is for Ball, C is for Cat and so on. My personal opinion has changed and in my picture book A does not stand for Apple but for Avoidance.

This avoidance isn't something I would fancy to have but rather a cold and cruel compilation of bittersweet facts. Looking back over to the guys I've gotten involved with both Nathan and Bruce had their names starting with A. Ryan - my best friend has just about everything I like in a guy but he doesn't turn me on the least bit even though he is quite attractive. By chance, his name also begins with the letter A. Then two guys with whom things got really messy once I turned them down also had their names from A. Another guy who took great interest in me up till the point he saw my picture also had an A name. And lastly a certain guy who's advances I'm trying to stop effecting me also has a name starting with the letter A.

There is most definitely a certain pattern to this madness. I don't know how the whole name business affects my relationship chemistry or just the fact how I have to behave with another guy. But in any case, it does make sense that I avoid such guys like the plague.

I won't deny that I have gotten a wee bit commitment phobic since my break up with Nathan. But the search is still going on. I am literally now scared to get to know the name of a certain guy I like. Everytime I send a message asking for his name and get a reply for it, I'm literally praying "Don't let the name be from the letter A! Don't let the name be from the letter A!". It's crazy but I can't help it! If I see a certain way out to save something from crashing and burning, I would grab on to every last straw I possibly can.

If you recall from an earlier post about my friend Ted who was trying to fix me up with his best friend. Unfortunately for me, his name started with the letter A. Uh Oh! Did my love boat sink even before leaving the dock?

No!, I told myself. Your being completely stupid and irrational, this really isn't something that you should give a second thought to. It's all in your head. Snap out of it! Given my history I can't help being so paranoid, but Ted really thinks we can be a great couple and I should really give him a chance.

Two days ago I got a text from Ted's friend asking if I was free for a phone call. I was and a three minutes later we were on. The talk started very casually with both of us updating each other about our lives. However the call was strictly business from his end. Turns out he is having some tough issues to face right now and doesn't really have time for a relation. He thinks I'm a great guy but we would be better off as friends. Perhaps at some other point, we would have been a good couple but now is not the right time. In short, it's over!

I'm not mad at him. I'm glad he was upfront and honest with me. He didn't really tell me what stuff is exactly going on but it it is indeed true - I hope he solves the issues soon. He's a nice guy. At any rate, another guy who's name starts with A turned me down. Please tell me it's not just in my head! 

Walk Fall Walk Run

There is a certain pattern to a certain kind of jerks you find Online. It is super hard to get to know them on a personal level because mostly they are on f*ck-and-run basis. They really don't want to know the other person besides the 'ASL - TBV' or rarely bother with it. If they do inquire then there is a pretty good chance that they are hoping for more than one time of humping. If you want to get to know them, you have to sleep with them. There is rarely an opportunity where you are able to catch one and keep him hooked without raising your legs in the air.

Maybe it's my experience but rarely do these fellows have taken any form of interests in me once I told them the shocking truth of my celibacy - yes, I am such a prude!

However there are always exceptions and I managed to snag not one but two bad boys and gotten them to confess what makes them how they are. Turns out that they both have been jilted pretty bad by their ex and they both have alot of things they want to say to their jerk of an ex. But they can't because either they have no idea as to how to say it without sounding hurt or their ex won't give them the time of the day because he has moved on to a new relationship or sleeping around with random guys - whatever tickles their pickle. Since they can't say anything to these guys - they take out their rage on one night stands where they don't let anything hold them back. Sad part is that they both want a relationship however are scared to attempt to do so again after how things ended for them last time. Is that how it plays out for every hook up artist out there?

Funny thing happened while I was talking to one of them - my iPod started playing 'Total Eclipse of the Heart' and I got stuck on the line - Once upon a time falling in love now I'm only falling apart! Creepy, no?

It's not like guys haven't asked them for a relationship. One of them is very good looking and I believe it when he says that he has three guys after him for a relationship. But he says that they just want him for how he looks - just like his ex wanted him. Once they would have him, they will tire out eventually and move on to somebody else while he's left all alone.

It surprised me that somebody in the sublime universe of my sexuality is actually taking a serious approach towards a relationship and isn't just playing around on a trial basis like trying to find which condom size fits him best. He actually wants something that would make him feel.

I really am in no position to tell them what they need to do next. They are more than 18 years so they are pretty capable of understanding how things are supposed to play out. But since I can't tell them, I can very much do what I want here.

The fact that they are horsing around is completely stupid in my opinion. If you're in the game, you have to learn to roll with the punches. It's highly unlikely that the first time you land a guy, he would turn out to be the one. If he doesn't turn out to be, you cherish the experience and learn from it. You realize what you want and what you do not want. You realize what you can live with and what you can't live with. Once you have done that - you hit the tracks again. Retreating to the bushes for a quickie is really not going to lead to something worthwhile. If everything I just mentioned failed to register then just understand this one thing - Love hurts when you do it right. And boy, does it hurt bad!

As a child, when we started to walk we all must have taken a really bad fall every now and then. What did we do next? We cried our hearts out and then we made another attempt. Pretty soon we were walking and then on we are running. Everybody is making videos of us walking around the house in our diapers and is so frigg'in happy.

More or less the same principle applies here. You walk (Read; Fall in love)- you fall (Read; Break up)- you walk again (Read; Fall in love again)- you run (Read; Keep falling in love with the same person again and again)- people make videos (Read; Happy Ending).

Just don't give up! 

Walk Fall Walk Run

There is a certain pattern to a certain kind of jerks you find Online. It is super hard to get to know them on a personal level because mostly they are on f*ck-and-run basis. They really don't want to know the other person besides the 'ASL - TBV' or rarely bother with it. If they do inquire then there is a pretty good chance that they are hoping for more than one time of humping. If you want to get to know them, you have to sleep with them. There is rarely an opportunity where you are able to catch one and keep him hooked without raising your legs in the air.

Maybe it's my experience but rarely do these fellows have taken any form of interests in me once I told them the shocking truth of my celibacy - yes, I am such a prude!

However there are always exceptions and I managed to snag not one but two bad boys and gotten them to confess what makes them how they are. Turns out that they both have been jilted pretty bad by their ex and they both have alot of things they want to say to their jerk of an ex. But they can't because either they have no idea as to how to say it without sounding hurt or their ex won't give them the time of the day because he has moved on to a new relationship or sleeping around with random guys - whatever tickles their pickle. Since they can't say anything to these guys - they take out their rage on one night stands where they don't let anything hold them back. Sad part is that they both want a relationship however are scared to attempt to do so again after how things ended for them last time. Is that how it plays out for every hook up artist out there?

Funny thing happened while I was talking to one of them - my iPod started playing 'Total Eclipse of the Heart' and I got stuck on the line - Once upon a time falling in love now I'm only falling apart! Creepy, no?

It's not like guys haven't asked them for a relationship. One of them is very good looking and I believe it when he says that he has three guys after him for a relationship. But he says that they just want him for how he looks - just like his ex wanted him. Once they would have him, they will tire out eventually and move on to somebody else while he's left all alone.

It surprised me that somebody in the sublime universe of my sexuality is actually taking a serious approach towards a relationship and isn't just playing around on a trial basis like trying to find which condom size fits him best. He actually wants something that would make him feel.

I really am in no position to tell them what they need to do next. They are more than 18 years so they are pretty capable of understanding how things are supposed to play out. But since I can't tell them, I can very much do what I want here.

The fact that they are horsing around is completely stupid in my opinion. If you're in the game, you have to learn to roll with the punches. It's highly unlikely that the first time you land a guy, he would turn out to be the one. If he doesn't turn out to be, you cherish the experience and learn from it. You realize what you want and what you do not want. You realize what you can live with and what you can't live with. Once you have done that - you hit the tracks again. Retreating to the bushes for a quickie is really not going to lead to something worthwhile. If everything I just mentioned failed to register then just understand this one thing - Love hurts when you do it right. And boy, does it hurt bad!

As a child, when we started to walk we all must have taken a really bad fall every now and then. What did we do next? We cried our hearts out and then we made another attempt. Pretty soon we were walking and then on we are running. Everybody is making videos of us walking around the house in our diapers and is so frigg'in happy.

More or less the same principle applies here. You walk (Read; Fall in love)- you fall (Read; Break up)- you walk again (Read; Fall in love again)- you run (Read; Keep falling in love with the same person again and again)- people make videos (Read; Happy Ending).

Just don't give up! 

Naughty And Nice

Last week in a gathering of friends, we ran into a discussion of a certain trait that we hate most about ourselves. I lied at my turn. I told them that I have no idea. Well it wasn’t entirely a lie. I do have a certain amount of idea about what I hate most. The reality is that I’m somewhat of a sadist!

Yeah, you read right!

I, Phunk Factor, in my sound state of mind openly declare that I’m a frigg’in sadist. I’m not talking about the whips, chains, leather kind of sadist. I’m more of an emotional sadist. I like to hurt my significant other, to make him realize that he needs to pay attention to me. I like to hurt my significant other, if he hurt me. And I like to hurt him hard. Really really hard!

Once again, I’m not talking about something like landing a punch or something on him. But something like ignoring his messages, not calling him up, making him wait. Anything to make say something that will tell me that he loves me. Yeah, I’m not all Mr. Nice Guy!

I hate that I feel the need to resort to such measures. I absolutely hate it! I have to fight an internal battle to keep these frigg’in urges under control and not let them take over my sense of reasoning and logic. While I’m on the roll of confessing, I need to make another confession. I find myself unfit of getting into a relationship because of this particular habit of mine. I cannot trust myself, so how will another person trust me?!

When I was with Nathan, I had to suppress this monster inside me constantly. I had to tell him to shut up and sit in a corner like a little brat. It was something I needed to do. I really did love Nathan, and that’s the frigg’in problem in this whole situation. The more I love someone and the more this monster is susceptible to break loose and go on a rampage. When I get signals that things are not going well, I feel like doing something crazy in order to make the other person realize that I exist. I’m not at all into bondage; I find it kind of cruel to be very honest. Then why do I feel this stupid craze to land a sick punch on his heart and shake him up super-bad?!

As a partner, it’s one of my responsibilities to protect my significant other from all harm possible. But how do I protect him against myself? Thinking about this the other night, I realized that maybe I need to stay single for a greater period now. Figure myself out further and find some way I can lock this monster once and for all. Maybe then only will I be able to find someone to love truly, deeply, madly. Whatever inside me that lies damaged and broken, I need to fix it.

The next day Ryan showed up with a cake to celebrate something which I will discuss in a later post. I told him that I wanted to stay single and not date anybody. Ryan strongly disagreed. He insisted that I needed to put myself out there. Upon that I told him that I’m scared to do that, because I do not want to fall in love. “If I love someone I can’t keep my big mouth shut for long. I am going to say something so as to get a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’ out of him, and then move forward or move on.”, I told him. “And I do not want to hurt anybody else!”

I feel a little guilty at times even now of getting Nathan involved, things would have been so much uncomplicated for him had I just kept my big mouth shut.

After that I confessed about this side of me, Ryan is the first person I have ever discussed it with. I had told him sometime ago but I didn’t go into details. This time I went into every possible detail I could remember and laid it all out on him. He had a completely different take on it, which maybe just as possible as my conclusion.

According to Ryan, I’m too nice. I’m way too nice. I’m so nice that I’m door-mat nice!

In simpler words, I’m submissive. I do as I’m told, even if I don’t agree with it. I don’t announce my displeasure at something, when I need to. I keep it all to myself. This creates a weird negativity inside me, which makes me think crazy thoughts. The whole point of being in a relationship is that there is a mutual acceptance of ideas, thoughts and opinions. He recalled several events with Nathan on which I should have said something but I kept my mouth shut. He instructed me strictly that if and when I get into a relationship, I need to be more open of what I want and what I feel. It’s not always rose petals and satin sheets. It should not be!

“Besides if someone falls for you, I will pose as your crazy stalker and chase him away!” Ryan debilitated. LOL!

I do feel that maybe that is the case. I should not be such a satee-savitree. I should be some more of Cruella Devil, minus all the cigarettes, skunk dyed hair and fur products. I’m anti-fur, you see! I believe that all of God’s creatures deserve to live and should not be killed to make clothes that will go out of style a season later. No siree!

So who ever comes up next, get ready for a lot more than just love bites! I’m going to rock our love-boat, make sure you go over-board and dive in after you. No Titanic, but do we really need another Ocean Liner disaster? ;)

Naughty And Nice

Last week in a gathering of friends, we ran into a discussion of a certain trait that we hate most about ourselves. I lied at my turn. I told them that I have no idea. Well it wasn’t entirely a lie. I do have a certain amount of idea about what I hate most. The reality is that I’m somewhat of a sadist!

Yeah, you read right!

I, Phunk Factor, in my sound state of mind openly declare that I’m a frigg’in sadist. I’m not talking about the whips, chains, leather kind of sadist. I’m more of an emotional sadist. I like to hurt my significant other, to make him realize that he needs to pay attention to me. I like to hurt my significant other, if he hurt me. And I like to hurt him hard. Really really hard!

Once again, I’m not talking about something like landing a punch or something on him. But something like ignoring his messages, not calling him up, making him wait. Anything to make say something that will tell me that he loves me. Yeah, I’m not all Mr. Nice Guy!

I hate that I feel the need to resort to such measures. I absolutely hate it! I have to fight an internal battle to keep these frigg’in urges under control and not let them take over my sense of reasoning and logic. While I’m on the roll of confessing, I need to make another confession. I find myself unfit of getting into a relationship because of this particular habit of mine. I cannot trust myself, so how will another person trust me?!

When I was with Nathan, I had to suppress this monster inside me constantly. I had to tell him to shut up and sit in a corner like a little brat. It was something I needed to do. I really did love Nathan, and that’s the frigg’in problem in this whole situation. The more I love someone and the more this monster is susceptible to break loose and go on a rampage. When I get signals that things are not going well, I feel like doing something crazy in order to make the other person realize that I exist. I’m not at all into bondage; I find it kind of cruel to be very honest. Then why do I feel this stupid craze to land a sick punch on his heart and shake him up super-bad?!

As a partner, it’s one of my responsibilities to protect my significant other from all harm possible. But how do I protect him against myself? Thinking about this the other night, I realized that maybe I need to stay single for a greater period now. Figure myself out further and find some way I can lock this monster once and for all. Maybe then only will I be able to find someone to love truly, deeply, madly. Whatever inside me that lies damaged and broken, I need to fix it.

The next day Ryan showed up with a cake to celebrate something which I will discuss in a later post. I told him that I wanted to stay single and not date anybody. Ryan strongly disagreed. He insisted that I needed to put myself out there. Upon that I told him that I’m scared to do that, because I do not want to fall in love. “If I love someone I can’t keep my big mouth shut for long. I am going to say something so as to get a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’ out of him, and then move forward or move on.”, I told him. “And I do not want to hurt anybody else!”

I feel a little guilty at times even now of getting Nathan involved, things would have been so much uncomplicated for him had I just kept my big mouth shut.

After that I confessed about this side of me, Ryan is the first person I have ever discussed it with. I had told him sometime ago but I didn’t go into details. This time I went into every possible detail I could remember and laid it all out on him. He had a completely different take on it, which maybe just as possible as my conclusion.

According to Ryan, I’m too nice. I’m way too nice. I’m so nice that I’m door-mat nice!

In simpler words, I’m submissive. I do as I’m told, even if I don’t agree with it. I don’t announce my displeasure at something, when I need to. I keep it all to myself. This creates a weird negativity inside me, which makes me think crazy thoughts. The whole point of being in a relationship is that there is a mutual acceptance of ideas, thoughts and opinions. He recalled several events with Nathan on which I should have said something but I kept my mouth shut. He instructed me strictly that if and when I get into a relationship, I need to be more open of what I want and what I feel. It’s not always rose petals and satin sheets. It should not be!

“Besides if someone falls for you, I will pose as your crazy stalker and chase him away!” Ryan debilitated. LOL!

I do feel that maybe that is the case. I should not be such a satee-savitree. I should be some more of Cruella Devil, minus all the cigarettes, skunk dyed hair and fur products. I’m anti-fur, you see! I believe that all of God’s creatures deserve to live and should not be killed to make clothes that will go out of style a season later. No siree!

So who ever comes up next, get ready for a lot more than just love bites! I’m going to rock our love-boat, make sure you go over-board and dive in after you. No Titanic, but do we really need another Ocean Liner disaster? ;)

Commitments and Resolutions

I do not believe in telling what I have resolved about. Firstly because I feel if you tell a resolution, it's liable to be broken easily. Secondly if a certain resolution of mine does break, nobody around me would really know about it. On the other hand if not told or recorded, they are very often forgotten. I want that when 2012 starts and this blog is still up and running strong I can do a post about how I fared with my resolutions. Already planning future posts, does that make me a visionary?

01. Stay Single - Believe it or not, this is actually my resolution. I need to stay single this year, or at least for as long as possible. It's going to be a really hard task since my heart seems to search for a boyfriend in just about every gay/bi guy I talk to. Also since I'm over Nathan, it's going to take even more of me not to rush into anything.

02. Date Guys - Now I realize that I may have confused you all abit by contradicting myself. But it's not like that. I do plan to stay single and date guys at the same time. I plan to meet them over a cup of coffee. I'd like to see what's out there and how do I fare against them. Coffee & Boys; my two favorite things of 2011!

03. Learn to Cook - I'm absolutely horrible at cooking. Absolutely horrible! I won't even invite my worst enemies over for a meal that I have cooked myself. Nobody deserves to die from indigestion. I really need to learn how to cook. My coffee making skills is a perfect recipe for battery acid. To be perfectly honest, the only thing I know how to make are those 2 minute noodles and frozen foods that just need to be fried. Yeah, I'm that bad!

04. Get Fit - I left the gym a little before my exams. It was getting too hard for me to manage my preparation and exercise schedule at the same time. I've rejoined the gym, infact I had my first session with weights today. Also I'm looking forward to learn swimming. I finally found a crystal clear pool that's uncontaminated from unpleasantness. Plus the swimming instructors are so hot. You could grate cheese off their abs!

05. Be Funnier - Am I fun enough? I believe I can be abit of a wet blanket at times. So this year it's about being more spontaneous, more risky, more adventurous - I think this would be the hardest one to do as it's something you are born with and not something you learn. Like Ryan, he's naturally fun!

06. Pray More Regularly - I was watching a religious talk show the other day. Something the host said is stuck in my head. I can't recall the exact words but he meant to say that when God calls us for prayers and we don't answer, how do we expect Him to answer to us when we call for Him?. I have started praying since past Ramadan, but I tend to skip some of the prayers at times. I need to start praying regularly. Pray 5 outta 5 times!

07. Blog Better! Blog More! - Although this is my resolution, I need help from you guys (My Readers ) on this one. I have a good deal of posts planned that I will be posting sooner or later, and certain topics I'd like to talk about. But if you have anything in particular you'd like me to post about or if you want to do a guest post, be my guest. Credit will be completely yours, I'll just be posting it for you. Everybody's welcome!

08. I'm Gay - Come out of the closet to a few important people. I have made an actual list. Right now, it contains 6 people. If I can manage to come out to all of them, it'll be a good year. If I manage to come out to all of them and not loose any, it'll be a great year.

09. Take a Trip this Summer - Go somewhere! Go anywhere! Go alone! Go with someone! Just go - as simple as that! ( I'm hoping for Canada really bad!)

10. Make some Lesbian friends - Where are all the girls? I'm seriously hanging from my last thread of hope. I need a heroine to save me!

That's my list! 

Let's see how many I manage to keep and how many do I fall short for. Oh and 2011 if you're listening, please be nice to me! I promise I'll only have nice things to say about you to 2012! :D